big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize