Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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