"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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