I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
