walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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