How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
You ruined the universe
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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