school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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