bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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