I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize