hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Randomize
