are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I just found puke in my bra..
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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