Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
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