Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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