That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
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he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
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