Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
