ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
