I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
