drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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