I think my vagina is haunted
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
