Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.