just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
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