I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
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He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
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It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
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