video games are the ultimate cock blocker
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize