Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize