i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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