Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
She just started grabbing all the hospital's rubber gloves and face masks and shoving them in her purse, saying, "My tax money paid for these!"
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
