I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
