well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
