I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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