Dual....:-)
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I think I ordered pizza when I got home. The email said the delivery time was noon today. So if that shit shows up I am the most amazing drunk on the planet.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
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