Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
