tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
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Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
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The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I'm way too hungover for life right now
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
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