No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
Girl in my public speaking class just gave a speech on weaves, God I love community college
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize