we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
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I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
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Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
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