too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
