I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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