it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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