i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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