the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Randomize
