Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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