Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
