what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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