I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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