haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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