I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Do you have feelings for this penis?
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
Randomize
