I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
i dont even know how to be here
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
Randomize
