you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
come pick me up. please. i just puked in my lap. bring pants.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
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