Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(650): View more from California

PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?

(773): View more from Illinois

No - puma.

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(336): View more from North Carolina

1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office

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(973): View more from New Jersey

Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(714): View more from California

He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.

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(816): View more from Missouri

It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.

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(773): View more from Illinois

No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.

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(440): View more from Ohio

I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom

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