Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(251): View more from Alabama

Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.

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(269): View more from Michigan

Pants 0. Shit 1.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.

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If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Read it at the TFLN blog
(239): View more from Florida

Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.

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(404): View more from Georgia

Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library

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(319): View more from Iowa

Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?

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(713): View more from Texas

you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.

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(678): View more from Georgia

I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.

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