Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
