At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Even the bartender felt bad for me
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
Pooping to opera.
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